so i wore a pride flag pin to work the other day and the kids were all interested (obviously) (find me a classroom of preschoolers who are not obsessed with rainbows) (i'll wait) so they crowded around to see.

"aww!" they said, "it's a flag!!"

but the thing is: they're little. a lot of them don't really have a handle on all their mouth sounds yet.

such as, notably, that tricky tricky "L" sound.

"Do you ever dream of land?" The whale asks the tuna.

"No." Says the tuna, "Do you?"

"I have never seen it." Says the whale, "but deep in my body, I remember it."

"Why do you care," says the tuna, "if you will never see it."

"There are bones in my body built to walk through the forests and the mountains." Says the whale.

"They will disappear." Says the tuna, "one day, your body will forget the forests and the mountains."

"Maybe I don't want to forget," Says the whale, "The forests were once my home."

"I have seen the forests." Whispers the salmon, almost to itself.

"Tell me what you have seen," says the whale.

"The forests spawned me." Says the salmon. "They sent me to the ocean to grow. When I am fat with the bounty of the ocean, I will bring it home."

"Why would the forests seek the bounty of the oceans?" Asks the whale. "They have bounty of their own."

"You forget," says the salmon, "That the oceans were once their home."

Last year I finally had an excuse to illustrate this simple little Tumblr story I've had bookmarked forever for class.

I hope you like it :]

Might be the best DM I have ever received as a tattooer

This is why accessibilityis so important.

To everyone saying they recognize the program this was made in and thinks this was an architectural software — NO IT WASN’T. This is a player wearing an orca avatar in an MMO at a public humiliation/exposure fetish place and as soon as the orca entered that place he found it was a bunch of real life photographs of old guys bending over and exposing their assholes. After staring at a certain German guy’s picture for too long the guy in the picture noticed this (he was zoomed in) and messaged the orca some shit like “does Sir like what he sees?” “the slave thanks you for looking.” the orca didn’t have the social skills to handle this, tried to be polite, panicked, tried to turn around but since the avatar is so big it was like the Austin Powers truck driving scene and every way he turned he saw more babyboomer asshole. how do i know this? that orca, was me

What are you even supposed to eat for dinner

And it’s like. Like it’s everyday girls.

my partner is only 40 but nestled within him is the soul of an elderly man

I don’t have a backbone but I have the opinions of someone who does

do you guys remember when we used to say oh worm all the time. remember that

is anybody out there